Members of my church (New Life) were called to fast for three weeks to focus on God and on the direction of the church. Because I'm already trying to lose weight, I didn't want to do a food fast because that seemed to benefit my diet efforts more than my "time with God" efforts. It's no secret that Facebook is a big time suck, so I decided to do a full Facebook fast and to limit TV time to only after 6 pm (which is still a lot). By doing this, I was able to spend more time reading the Bible and in prayer. I may continue to limit Facebook and TV time.
So what did I come away with from this fast? I did enjoy reading the Bible and praying, so the goal of spending more focused time with God was achieved. When praying for the direction of New Life, some thoughts did cross my mind that did initially sadden me. When I first started coming to New Life, it was pretty diverse and that's one of the main factors that drew me. The other main factor was that they were doing good work in the community. I wasn't sure if I believed in Jesus so, if I was gong to go to a church, I wanted to at least go to one that helped the community. They work with Mission Solano which provides shelter and services to homeless people. Being helpful to the community was a sundae and the diversity was the cherry on top.
A few years ago, New Life finally got a building off I-80 near the Vacaville/Fairfield border. When I first started attending, they were working out of school gyms and later a warehouse. It was always the senior pastor's vision to build a church in that type of location, and to reach out to at-risk youth and families. It may just be my imagination but, after we moved to the building, we seemed to slowly lose some of the cultural and ethnic diversity. While reflecting on this, it saddened me. It may have been a simple thing like geography and people no longer wanted to drive further to the new location. It may have been that many went to other churches - like the one David Cobb (former worship leader) went to or the Father's House which is a large church off of I-80 in Vacaville... or it may be that, like me, they saw the congregation becoming less diverse and didn't feel as comfortable as before.
These thoughts made me reflect on whether I still belong at New Life or if I should seek a more diverse and liberal church... or even go back to one of my SF churches (First Chinese Baptist Church in Chinatown or Sunset Ministry) where my husband might attend too. Solano County is fairly conservative in Fairfield/Vacaville, so it's no surprise that the New Life congregation is fairly conservative (especially with less POC). Of course I realize that I now lean very left so, in reality, maybe they're not THAT conservative. The pastor himself is fairly neutral politically (maybe with a slight left lean) and I like his messages a lot. After prayers and discussions with my daughters, I've concluded that I should stay with New Life. It helps me to grow to hear a conservative voice and to try to understand their viewpoints.
And perhaps He wants me there to be the liberal voice... the one to say, "Hey, these NFL players may be rich but they and those they love have been needlessly harassed and/or killed by law enforcement. Don't listen to the President - they are not protesting the anthem or flag. They are crying out for justice." I actually did have this conversation with some friends over coffee after church one day. It was uncomfortable for me because I know I was in the minority in my opinion, but I did feel called to say it. Most people my age (and older) were raised to stand and say the pledge of allegiance and it was ingrained in us. And so most people form their opinions off of their experiences only. They don't always look at the indignities and injustices others have to suffer. That's human nature and I don't blame them; but perhaps I'm here to give a differing viewpoint.
The rest of my free time was spent working for the ACLU People Power Texting Team for events around the country. I also went to the Women's March in SF with my friends... and I spent more time on my bicycle where I often have good conversations with God and/or listen to KLOVE and NPR. I've cleaned up my Apple News Feeds to remove CNN and FOX; and focused on Reuters, AP, New York Times, Washington Post, Wall Street Journal.
I've decided to spend less time arguing on Facebook because people rarely change their minds or even really want to know what others are thinking. They just want to fight; and I don't want to be one of those people. I'll still comment on other people's posts who have similar views as me, but I'll be scrolling past the inflammatory pro-Trump posts I see (clearly some people can't/won't hear a liberal view). And I'll still post a few of my opinions and thoughts along the way to show that there are some Christians who don't support Trump or his administration. That there are some of us that think like John Pavlovitz - we want equal rights and justice for women, LGBTQ, people of color. We don't want large corporations to get large tax breaks and then layoff people or offshore jobs. We realize that many people in America were descended from dreamers or slaves, and don't believe these myths about refugees (ironically from Mike Pence's home state of Indiana).
I will also try to spend more time on this blog because I've found it interesting to look back and read some of the things I posted in the past. I don't get much traffic here but, even if just one person learns that there are Christians who don't support Trump-type views, then it's worth the effort.
(Update 2/11 - After greeting for first service, I saw quite a few new POC... Which makes me think that perhaps I simply miss some people that no longer attend New Life.)
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